Don't Try to Hide it
by April Innocent
Summary: FORMALLY WHY CAN'T I BE NORMALAU. Mary didn't mean to. She couln't help it. Couldn't help falling in love with the one man she can't have...
1. Home at Last

_**Warning: This story will contain incest. If this bothers you, please don't read!**_

_Chapter 1: Home at Last_

_I'm home._

"Wow" I whisper.

It's almost midnight as I pull up into the driveway. The house looked the same as last time I was here. The same flawless white house where my normal family lived. I stepped into the kitchen. Everything was sparking clean, just like it used to be. It was so perfect.

"Mary! You're home!" Mom comes over to me and wraps me in a hug. I have such a loving family. Why did I ever leave?

_Because I had too_, a little voice said, _because I had to get away and straighten myself out. If anyone found out… _I quickly shook the thought out of my head. No need go there, again.

Mom led me up the stairs. We passed Ruthie's room where she was sleeping peacefully. I wished I could sleep like that.

"Ruthie and the twins are asleep and everyone else is out. We didn't except you to come till tomorrow." Mom said as we stopped at the attic.

"Well, I guess I'll leave to get settled." Mom turned to leave but came back to embrace me again with tears in her eyes. "Everyone is so glad you've come home" she murmured.

"I'm glad to be home Mom" I said and hugged her back.

After I unpacked, I jumped on the bed. I heard voices below me. Everyone was home. I should go down there...no I was too tired. Tomorrow I'll see everyone. I pulled the covers over me and fall asleep.

"_I'm not a baby Mary! I can have sex!" Lucy cried. _

"_Lucy you're just a kid!" I said exasperated._

_She looks right at me with her beady eyes. She exploded, "You're jealous! You're mad cause I stole your boyfriend!"_

_Lucy whips out a knife from no where. "You want him don't you?" she sneers as she comes closer._

"_No!" I stammer, "Lucy please don't kill me!"_

"_Lies!" she screamed. She drove at me and sent the knife into my head._

"_Noooooooo"_

I woke up screaming. I covered my mouth and listened if anyone heard me. Silence. I sighed and get up to get a glass of water.

I remembered Lucy really wanted to have sex. Matt actually followed her and ripped her out of the guy's car and into his. Then he went to get me. But **I** wasn't doing anything wrong; I was just at a sleepover. _That was **co-ed**._ I didn't tell Mom and Dad because they wouldn't have let me go. Matt filmed me and Lucy as we talked to Mom and Dad for his project. What an asshole. _I'm glad he took me home… Matt's so protective and caring and really cute… _

Whoa! No, I can't still have those feelings I rush down the stairs and into the kitchen. I grab a glass and fill it. I gulp the down all the water at once. I worked so hard to control my feelings; how can thinking about him upset me? I heard footsteps behind me so I spun around and gasped.

"Hey Mary"

Please review!


	2. Old Feelings Return

_Chapter 2: Old feelings Return_

I find myself looking in the eyes of my beloved brother.

"**Matt? **I-I, uh, what are you doing here?" I said quickly.

"I could ask you the same question. Weren't you supposed to come tomorrow?"

I chewed on my lip.

"I just couldn't wait to be home." I gushed, hoping Matt would believe me.

"Oh"

He seemed unconvinced. He starts up the stairs but then pauses.

"Mary, why did you run away?" he asked curiously.

How could he **dare** ask that? I was arrested! I was so frustrated with myself: I needed to get out of here.

"I needed my space. I needed to start a new life." I said with forced calmness.

"OK, well, good night" He goes back to his room.

I took a deep breath in an attempt to calm myself. I didn't feel better so I decided to take a walk. Everything was so peaceful as the sun started to come up.

In the beginning I thought I was only becoming friends with Matt. Then I was angry whenever he went out on dates. I thought I was pissed just because he was asking out sluts and he was going to get hurt. But those girls weren't sluts and Matt could take care of himself. What was I doing? But he always watched over the girls in the family I should do the same for him.

_Oh please. I hate every girl he paid attention to, even my sisters and Mom. He should only pay attention to **me**. I would take care of him for the rest of my life and we would be together forever…_

NO! Why did I think like that again? I have told myself over and over that I can never have him. I was brought up in home that went to church every Sunday. Being in love with your brother was unheard of. If anyone found out I would be shunned from my family forever. Then I would never see Matt again. However I needed some time away from them to gain control of my feelings. So I was an accomplice to a crime so no one would wonder why I ran away. I was in control so that's why I came back.

But if I couldn't handle talking to Matt someone might find out…

_This is going to be harder than I thought…_

I stepped into the kitchen and eight pairs of eyes turn towards me. So much for no one knowing I was gone. Everyone rushes to me, says how happy they we're that I was home and they missed me. I expected this to happen but I didn't realize that it felt kind of nice to be missed.

After all the hugging and I sit down for breakfast, Dad casually asked, "Where were you this morning?"

I gulped. _Think of something that will make them get all sentimental! _"I took a walk. I wanted to see the town looked like." I said with a big smile.

Everyone smiles back and continues to eat. _I'm such a fake. _

**_Thanks Babs567 for reviewing!_**


	3. And Then What?

Chapter 3

I lay sprawled on my bed. How long could I hide this? Should I even hide it? I jumped up. What **would** happen if I told Matt? _Oh yeah, that would go well! He'd never speak to me again! _I buried my face in the pillow.

"Mary!" Oh great, Lucy's coming. _Lucy the boyfriend stealer. _

"What's wrong with you?" Lucy looked at me concerned.

"Just tired."

"Come on, you're in love!"

I sat up startled. "What did you just say?"

"You're lying around doing nothing all day."

"So?"

"Mary, you hate that! So who is it? It must be someone you can't have."

Wow, Lucy amazes me sometimes. "I'm just trying get over my last boyfriend."

Lucy smiled sympathetically. "Well, dinner going to be ready in an hour. Are you going to come down?"

"Okay"

I really didn't want to eat with them, but if I don't they'll think something's wrong. To make things worse, **Matt** was there. I spoke very little and stared at my plate.

"You're really quiet" I looked up at **him**. No I shouldn't have done that!

"I'm really tired." Matt nods. I handled that a lot better than last night. Maybe I can get over him.

I can't sleep. I keep playing the scene with Matt over and over in my head. Questions popped into head. _Does he hate me? Does he think I'm mad at him? _Does he even have a girlfriend… I better just take a walk.

I heard someone as I go downstairs. Who is that?

I screamed. My brother was slumped against the wall and looked filthy. His eyes flutter open and he moaned. Oh he's just drunk. I walked up to him and he pressed me against the wall.

"What the hell are you doing?" I stammered. He then did the thing I've dreamed about for so long. He kissed me. Hard.

In stories, the girl is usually drunk and the guy is all noble. He won't take advantage of her because he loves her so much. I am not noble. I've wanted him for so long this could be my only chance. _And tomorrow morning he'll wake up with a hangover and remember all the things I've done. _I pulled back. Matt **could **remember what happened. But I shouldn't risk it. I guided him to the sofa and throw a blanket over him. How could I be so **dumb**? He **will** remember. And then what will happen?

It's been nearly a month since I saw Matt. He got up in the morning and just took off. No one has heard anything from him. It's my fault. If I hadn't been so stupid… I had worked so hard to avoid anything like this from happening and I **blew** it. I can't live without him. I love Matt more than ever. If he doesn't come home, what's the point of living?

Why am I still alive?

It would be so easy to shove a bunch of pills down my throat and end it all.

Or take a knife and slash it across my arms. Make it look like someone murdered me.

Yes that's what I'll do…

**I don't really like how this chapter came out so I might redo it. I think it's too rushed.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed!**


	4. Come Back, Please

Chapter 4: Come Back, Please

Why hadn't I thought of it before? If I died, then when Matt dies, we'll be together in heaven.

I need to get the knife from the kitchen when no one's around. Forget that, I'll just use a razor and get it over with now.

I locked the door to the bathroom. The blade looked so sharp. It would hurt so badly when it pierces my skin. _Do you want to be with him or not?_

I dragged the blade down my arm. Blood seeped out of it. Ew, that's disgusting! Blood really **does** smell like copper!

There was a loud knock on the door.

I bandaged my arm and cleaned up the bathroom.

"Hurry up in there!" Simon snapped.

I opened the door and went downstairs.

There's a chance Matt could come back. I just have to find him. Where would he have gone? If only I could contact him…

Maybe I could get him to come to me. But how? A slow smiled crept up my face as an idea dawned on me.

I decided to parade around the town. It's been weeks since I went outside.

I walked to the busiest street in town. Cars and trucks zoomed by. I took a deep breath. It was now or never.

I threw myself in front of a car and prayed I'd come out alive.

* * *

"_We're here live at Elm Street in Glen Oak, California where a person has been hit. Witnesses say the woman ran right into a car. She has broken a leg and some ribs and has a concussion, but is expected to make it-We have just received the woman's name. She is Mary Camden-"_

_Matt snapped the TV off. What was Mary thinking? Was she doing this because of him?_

_Because of the kiss? But she wanted it as much as he did. Maybe even more._

_The truth was Matt was in love with Mary._

_When she came home, he spent most of his time there, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. But then he heard Mary speak with Lucy. Mary wasn't over her last boyfriend. Matt hated the guy, whoever he was, for hurting her. He imaged her boyfriend's hands all over her, Mary slapping him and coming back because of him._

_Matt tried to get through dinner that night but she looked so sad. He couldn't stand to see her in pain._

_So he drank in an attempt to forget her._

_Somehow in his drunken state, he wandered on home and leaned against the wall. Soon he detected someone screaming. Mary walked over to him and he kissed her. But she pulled back and leaded him to the couch. He must have scared her so the next morning he ran away to a sleazy motel in Nevada._

_Now she tried to kill herself. What if she tried again…and successes?_

_If Mary died he'd never forgive himself._

_It was time to come home._

**Big thanks ELM-Tree10 for the idea for this chapter!**

**Thank you Libby, ****Slo Motion****, Babs567, and ****jafarjasmineforever2005**** for reviewing! **


	5. I'll Die For You

**A/N: I edited Chapter 4 but there aren't any major changes if you don't want to read it.**

Chapter 5: I'll Die For You

"I'm looking for Mary Camden's room."

"Over that way, second door on the left."

"Thanks."

Matt walked up to the door of Mary's room and paused at the doorway. She looked terrible. Her leg was in a cast and propped up. A beeping machine and an IV were hooked up to her. Nasty scratches went down her left arm.

"Oh Mary," he murmured, "My poor Mary."

Was this all his fault?

"Oh my God, Matt!"

'Good old Lucy', he thought sarcastically. Now he had to get out of answering his "loving" family's questions.

"I need to take a walk" he said quickly. Unfortunately, Simon offered to go with him. They walked down the hallway until Simon spun around to face Matt.

"Why'd you run away?"

How could he ask that? He kissed Mary! Well, Simon didn't know that but still.

"I needed my space. I needed to start a new life" Matt tried to say calmly.

Wasn't that what Mary told him?

"Ok, did Mary know that?"

Matt was startled, "What?"

"Look, I know there's something going on between you two."

'I wish' he thought. "How'd you come up with that?"

"The night she came back, Ruthie heard her talking to you, and Mary didn't come back till the morning. Lucy said she was depressed and lying around. At dinner she didn't talk at all, and she looked so scared when you talked to her. That night, I heard her scream and the next morning you had run away."

Matt snorted. "It sounds like you're in love with her."

"I care about her like a sister." Simon scowled.

'Too bad we can't trade places' Matt sadly thought.

He sighed, "You're a pervert, you know that? Let's go back to Mary's room."

He almost wanted to confide in Simon, but how could he risk the whole family finding out?

The boys made their way to Mary's room as the family was just leaving.

"Do you guys mind if I stay another minute?" Matt asked. They hesitantly agreed.

After they left, he stood over Mary's bed and stared at her. Did she try to kill herself? Why would she do that? 'Unless, maybe, she feels the same way...' It made a lot of sense, but Matt was only starting to believe that. But if she **did **love him, she must think he hates her.

If Mary died, she dies never knowing Matt returned her feelings.

"Don't leave me" he whispered.

Lucy sighed. "Are you telling me that Matt and Mary, our **siblings**, are in love with each other?"

"Yes."

"Simon, you're really twisted."

"It's true!"

Lucy frowned. "It does explain a lot, but them together, it's **disgusting**!"

Ruthie walked in, "Who together is disgusting?"

Simon and Lucy looked at each other. She was too young to know what was going on.

"Ruthie, go help Mom."

"Why?"

"Just go!"

Ruthie scowled and went downstairs.

"You don't think we should have told her, do you?"

"No way, she wouldn't understand it, **I** don't understand it!" Lucy replied. "What are we going to do about this?"

"We're going to get them together."

Her mouth dropped, "W-What?"

"We have to," Simon said firmly. "Otherwise, they'll die for each other."


	6. Searching

Chapter 6: Searching

Ruthie hesitantly reached out for the door. 'I shouldn't be doing this, this is an invasion of privacy!' she thought. 'Just shut up and open the door!' her mind countered.

She pulled the attic door open and rushed up the stairs. Ruthie had eavesdropped after Lucy had kicked her out, so she knew what was going on. Simon had convinced her to help Matt and Mary with their "situation". But Lucy wanted solid proof.

"If we're wrong, we'll look like gross little perverts!" she had said.

So they were going through each of their sibling's rooms in an attempt find **anything** that proved their older siblings had crossed the ultimate taboo.

Ruthie was mostly looking for a diary that could tell of Mary's hidden feelings. 'Unless she has a statue of Matt in her closet' she giggled, but then frowned for thinking such a thought.

She checked under the mattress, in the drawers, and yes, in the closet, but found nothing. She stomped downstairs and met with Simon.

"I found nothing." Ruthie pouted.

"Look what I came across in the bathroom." Simon said grimly. He showed her a razor blade with blood smeared on it.

She winced, "You don't mean Mary…"

"She was taking a long time in the bathroom before she got hit."

"And the scars on her arm…"

"Isn't this enough evidence for Lucy?"

"No, we should look around Matt's apartment."

He sighed. "We'll have to pick the lock or break the window to get in." Simon hoped all this snooping was

going to be worth it.

* * *

Matt sat beside his beloved sister, studying her. It had been three days since she was hit and she still wasn't conscious. He was starting to wonder what would happen if she died. The doctors said she'd be fine, but what if they were wrong? He had tried living without her and he had wanted to die. If Mary was gone forever, he'd never survive. 

He started feeling this way about her when she ran away. It began with wondering where she was and what she was doing, which he thought was normal older brother behavior. Soon he became obsessed. Nothing else seemed to matter and days went by slowly. Every night he wished she would come back. When she finally did, it was the happiest day of his life.

"Sir, visiting hours are over" a buxom nurse said.

Matt got up and slowly moved toward the door.

"Are you her boyfriend?"

He jumped. "What? No, no, I'm her brother."

"Oh, it's just that you spent all day with her, so I thought…"

"It's okay."

Without another word, Matt left.

* * *

"How are we going to get in?" Ruthie asked, "I really don't want to break a window." 

Simon opened the door. "It wasn't even locked."

They stepped into the apartment.

"Uh, what are we looking for?"

"There are a lot of beer bottles here." Simon pointed at the overflowing trash bin.

"Maybe if Matt comes home drunk, we can ask him if he's in love with Mary." She said sarcastically.

They heard heavy footsteps coming.

"Hide!" Simon and Ruthie ran into the closet as the door swung open.

The oldest Camden slouched as he made his way to the fridge and pulled out a six-pack of beer.

"He going to drink it all at once!" she whispered.

Matt looked up and started toward the closet.

'Good job Ruthie' Simon scowled.

How were they supposed to get out of this?

* * *

anonymous-I didn't really want Lucy to know butit's better all the siblings know. She's not going to get very involved though.

Slo Motion-Your welcome!

Norwegianchick101-Yeah, actually, sometimes I creep myself out for writing this

Libby-Thanks for the review!

ELM-Tree10- I forgot to add the lines, but I remembered this time:)

Mary is going to wake up in the next chapter so the story will be told her POV again.


	7. Pain and the end

_Pain, so much pain…_

My eyes flutter open. A beeping machine? My leg in a cast? What have I done?

The whole story comes back. I ran in front of a car, I cut myself, Matt left.

Oh Matt.

I can't take it anymore. I finally cry out all my frustration, tears soaking my gown. _You're a dirty woman_, I scold myself, _you ruined your life, your family's life, that driver's life, all for the one person you can't have. _

"Mary?" someone calls out softly.

My eyes are too blurry to see who it is.

"Go away." I sobbed

Arm went around me, crushing me.

"My ribs." I gasped out.

"Oh I'm sorry." the person lets go.

I wipe away the tears.

Matt.

Did he find out what happened to me? Oh no, that damn kiss! That's what he's here about!

"I'm sorry about that kiss. I don't know what happened but-" He cupped my chin so I look at him. His eyes are filled with, love? No that's wishful thinking.

"I don't regret that moment. I never will"

Suddenly his lips are upon mine. It wasn't like any kiss I've had before, it was hot and demanding. I began to kiss him back with as much passion as he had.

"Whoa!" someone said softly.

I open my eyes and see Ruthie and Simon running out. Whatever, I have more important matters at hand.

He pulls away and slowly smiles at me. God he's hot. _Just how far will this go?_

Sex? With Matt? Actually that seems like a tempting idea. But my damn leg and ribs!

"What's going to happen between us?" I blurt out.

His smile fades.

"I don't know. We can't hide it forever-"

"But we can't run away and worry the family." I finished for him.

"Maybe we could tell our parents?" I thought out loud.

"Are you serious!" he exclaimed, "Our god loving parents! They'll probably make us have counseling or make sure we never see each other again."

I glare at him, almost crying again.

"It was just a thought." I snapped.

His face softens. "We'll ruin our family if we tell."

"I know, but what if we stay for a little while, then make up some excuse to move far away?"

His eyebrows furrow. "Like what excuse?"

"I don't know, you got a job somewhere and I decide to come with you."

"We have to stay for at least a couple of weeks so they don't worry" About me.

I grin "I think I can't control myself, how about you?"

Matt grins too. "Oh I don't think I will."

And then I can see in his big brown eyes, everything will be okay. Some how.

* * *

There you have it. The end. I think. I'm sorry I took so long but today I finally decided to end it now. It's not the best chapter though, what do you think? And should I rewrite all chapters or leave it alone? Much love to everyone who reviewed, Babs567. Libby, Slo Motion, jafarjasmineforever2005, ELM-Tree10, Norwegianchick101, and anonymous. BTW Elm Tree in chapter 4 I didn't realize I put elm street but then I reread and I was like "OH that's where I got it from" Lol, I'm so slow. And what helped me write chapter 3 and 4 was Mavin's Hey Love which you can listen to at http/ click on Hey Love. Good bye for now! 


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